Match 1) Tommy Dreamer beat Bully Ray
- Remember when there use to be a awesome X division match opening the PPV. Not anymore
- Dreamer hit Ray with a large stuffed Despicable Me character at one point
- Devon's sons came out and distracted Ray so Devon and Dreamer could hit the 3D on Ray
Match 2) Sarite & Rosita beat Angelina Love & Winter to win the Knockout Tag Titles
- Winter came out with a blindfold on. She looked like a pet eagle
- Velvet tried to help out, but ended up costing Angelina & Winter the titles
Then they cut to the Jarrett's on their honeymoon at Universal Studios with their kids. Alots of pizza and rollercosters. Karen is pissed
Then Matt Morgan interview backstage. He said Hernandez cost him the title. If this is true, then I would like to personally thank Hernandez
Match 3) Hernandez beat Matt Morgan via fake blood
- This was the first time in a long time that I have seen a finger rank across the back. Thank you Hernandez
- Morgan did at one point look like Van Helsing trying to kill Dracula
- The ref got knocked out and Hernandez squirt fake blood on Morgan and got the win
Backstage: One of the Hardys Lite (Gen Me) said it was his birthday and he was going to win the X Division Title. He then said he was going to take it back to the hotel and put it on his birthday cake.
Match 4) Kaz beat Gen Me, and Robbie E in a Ultimate X match to retain the title
- Alot of awesome spots
- This would of been a great opening match for the PPV
- There was this cool spot for Robbie powerbombed Jeremy, who was superplexing Kaz
- Teased a Gen Me break up. I felt like I was watching the Rockers breaking up again
- Best match of the night
Honeymoon Update #2: Karen was still pissed, Jeff kept bringing pizza for the kids and being super dad. He then told Karen that she was getting wet. Karen thought vagina, Jeff thought water ride
Match 5) Beer Money beat Ink Inc to retain the Tag Titles
- Another great match for Beer Money
- It's good to see that the Tag Team division is alive and well
- Another teased tag team break up with Ink Inc, this was a common theme tonight
Match 6) AJ beat Cold Blood Matt Hardy
- Matt has his braided hair again
- AJ did a cool move where he was whipped to the guardrail, but slid under it. He then jumped up on the rail and dove at Hardy
- At one point Ric Flair grabbed AJ's junk when the ref wasn't looking
- AJ hit a Spiral Tap on Hardy from the top rope to get the win
- Good match thanks to AJ, but that's no surprise
Honeymoon Update #3: Karen is still pissed and says she wants to go back to the hotel. Jeff said that he's going to call a truce with Kurt this Thursday on Impact. Then a big splash of water dumps down on Jeff,Karen, and the kids. Karen got wet.
Match 6) 1# Contender match between Mr Anderson and Rob Van Dam
- Ended in a double count out
- What a terrible finish. This is why TNA will never be on the same level or even close to the WWE
- The whole crowd should a been chanting "Fire Russo" following this finish.
Match 7) Sting beat Jeff Hardy to retain the Divas Championship Belt
- Bischoff can out and made the match "No Disqualification Match"
- Sting then proceeded to hit Hardy with two punches and then hit the Scorpion Death Drop for the win. This match lasted under a minute. Terrible
Summary:
I really don't know what to say. I haven't been this upset/disappointed with a PPV since Wrestlemania 2000, and that was only because I wanted Foley to win the title and swore off all wrestling for 4 years. I really had high hopes for this PPV. The Ultimate X match was great, and the Beer Money/ Ink Inc Tag match was solid, but those last two matches left me feeling like I had been raped without any lube. I really had hope for this company, and I have stood by on their side since 2005, but tonight I'm done. TNA you have officially jumped the shark. Please do yourself a favor and buy Ring of Honor's online PPV's on April 1st and 2nd on gofightlive.tv. I personally guarantee you will not be disappointed. It's only $19.95 for both nights and is a far better product, it will make you forget that this PPV ever happen. I also like how Kurt Angle is featured on the poster for this PPV and wasn't even there, but I guess that's what you get when you wait four days before the PPV to announce the card. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go take my scorching hot rape shower.
Also, follow us on Twitter @wrestlinggold
No comments:
Post a Comment